The Year [Part-4]

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Note: This is Part 4 of the series of articles "The Year".



More than half of the year was over and when I see myself 9 months ago, I see a totally different person. I was changed, I knew this; no one ever told me but I liked the changes in me, I became less insecure, more confident, and grew more love for some people. I was happy with the change in me.
Nine months were over and now only three months were left to be faced, I made my mind for the worst case, and didn’t expect anything good ahead. Yet I tried everything to make the rest months to be easy and happy. But life proved me wrong again.

October went in silence, it brought some difficulties but they seemed to be very small compared to the rest that I have faced in the previous few months. I tried to keep the bond between three friends, as I thought they were the only ones who were always there for me; I was trying to grow that friendship with them. I grew the love for one.

Related imageNovember was full of confusion and an unknown feeling for someone. Everything was going slowly and steadily. There was nothing too good, during this whole year, there is only one thing that I hated the most in this whole year and that was my day to day routine, I used to have a pretty interesting and fun life, everyday used to bring entertaining things in front of me. But now my daily routine was to attend school, come back, talk to the three and only friends and then sleep, there was nothing interesting to do. Yet I was happy with that, those three friends daily made me happy. I was satisfied with that. But my life was not, so my life shook me once again.
The girl I love, I used to talk to her at least I tried to, but later her response was getting slow, I thought she might be busy, then I recognised that she had no interest in talking with me, I was confused. Later she confessed that she is trying to ignore me purposely, I was upset with that, we had a quarrel. And she again ran away without any reasons, my heart was broken, I cried that night. We didn’t talk for few weeks. I was constantly waiting for her message, but it didn’t come. So one day I messaged her to end our friendship, that day she confessed that she didn’t like the way I use to love her. She requested me to stop loving her. I was confused, as it was one sided love and I own it, I don’t need her to love her, yet she was stopping me from doing so. I told her that, I’ll never stop loving her; I want her but with her own happiness not by enforcing her. I still wait for her. I still have hope.

We sorted our problems, and everything went on track again. In these ten months, I faced many things and those things made me better at some contexts. The end of the year was near. It was December and was excited about it. It was like, I’d a feeling that after all these full of sadness the end of the year will be great and happy, so I was trying to make everything be flawless, I was careful about my every single move. But nothing happens according to my need. So, after every careful move of mine, I still faced problems, I’d a fight with my best friend. She made me feel worse. My heart was broken again, yet I managed to continue to make the end happy, later that best friend fought with the one I loved, and then nothing went well. I was reduced to only one friend. The girl I love turned into someone else, she became so sad and whenever I talked to her she used to seem upset. The whole situation was making me mad. I made a visit to my hometown and managed to meet my friends. I met the girl I love and it made my whole month. Yet the annoying feeling which was created by the fight that I’d with my best friend was eating my happiness slowly. Then one day, my best friend messaged me and we both shared our feelings and after that I got to know my value in her eyes and then everything came back to the track. Still 3 days are left, before new-year and I still do not expect anything much from it.

I still hope that the girl I love will love me back, I still hope that my best friend will understand me, I still hope that my brother will be always there with me as he always stands beside me.


This isn't the end.



Story Written By Akshat Atray.
#LivingHerSmile

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